Thoughts About Comments

I have enjoyed the comments that give me specific points to improve on, hether it is increasing the story length, giving greater detail about specific characters, or fixing sentences that are confusing. I also like the comments that give specific things that I did well on. Basically the more specific the comment the more useful I find it. Making jokes also makes things more entertaining

Week 5 Storytelling: A Missed Opportunity for Shantanu

 Title: Mahabharata PDE Edition

Author: Vyasa

Year: 2009

Once upon a time, there was a magnificent king named Shantanu. He had spent many years in service of his kingdom, but wanted to find a beautiful, young wife to marry. As he strolled along the marvelous Yamuna River, he gazed upon a heavenly beauty named Satyavati.

Satyavati had a miraculous birth of destiny because she was inside of a fish when a fisherman was fishing. She was kept and raised as his own. Growing up, she had a fishy smell, and all of the friends made fun of her. Satyavati of returned home in tears because of the mean things that were said to her. She didn't understand why she was born with such a bad odor that never fades. She felt like an outcast, an ugly duckling, and that she has recently been completely misunderstood. Shantanu wanted to be with Styavati, but lost her in the thick of the forest.

One day, Satyavati came across a mighty brahmin named Parashara, who was awestruck by Satyavati's beauty. Parashara wanted Satyavati to be his wife, so he made a vow that she smell as a lovely perfume. Parashara and Satyavati had a fast romance and soon after meeting, they found out that they were having a baby! Satyavati was ecstatic to hear the news and couldn't wait to have the privileged of being a mother.

After nine months, Vyasa was born. Vyasa was a very mature man for someone his age, and continued to grow quickly in both stature intelligence. After he had grown into manhood, Vyasa left his mother and his friends to enter into the dark forest in order to test and hone his skills,

After Vyasa, moved far away, Parashara wanted to ensure that Satyavati felt safe and had the ability to reach out to him whenever he is needed. He was terrified in the fact he was moving away from his mother. He continued to thrive and prosper throughout his whole life, never forgetting each year to return to his mother to tell her about everything that has happened in the past year. Even to this day, Satyavati is visited every year by Vyasa. Pleasantries are passed back and forst, and Vyasa returns to his home.

Towards the end of Satyavati's life, King Shantanu once again saw her. He still desired to marry her, but discovered that he had already been married. Although Shantanu was a little jealous, he congratulated her on her beautiful son.

Author's Note: This story is loosely based off of the story when King Shantanu and Satyavati meet. It is meant to read as a bedtime story with a little bit of an unusual love and ending.

King Shantanu and Satyavati (image info)

Week 5 Reading Diary: Mahabharata PDE Edition Pt 1

·         Title: Mahabharata PDE Edition

Author: Vyasa

How did Uparichara drip semen? How did it fall to the river when he was in a car??

·         King Shantanu must have really loved Ganga if he allowed her to kill their first 7 children. Who loves someone that much? Or was there something else going on behind the scenes?

·         I feel like the story is moving extremely quick and hard to follow because so many people are getting married/born/introduced

·         Bhishma killed many people with a single arrow each and was awarded 3 princesses and brought them back to Hastinapura, so they could become the wives of Vichitravirya

·         It’s a little strange that Amba was willing to kill herself in order to be born again as a man, so she/he could have the power to kill Bhishma.

·         How difficult would it be to throw yourself into a fire and still have the concentration to chant something?

·         Vidura’s birth sounds very similar to Jesus Christ’s birth. A God who was born among men.

·         Kunti and her son sounds a lot like Moses’s mother sending him down the river as a baby to escape death and was discovered by Egyptian royalty.

·         Pandu really needs to stop killing deer. He kills one dear and gets cursed to die in the arms of one of his wives. Then he kills another deer who was having sex and was cursed to die with his wife when he was having sex..

·         Hard to believe that snake poison counteracted the poison that was already in Bhima. Were his ties so loose that he could simply break out of them?

Bhima and the Nagas